list of crucial things to do in August.

1. use fairy nargles as plausible explanation as to why Percy's ability to keep blog posts is about as admirable as Ambrosius Flume's ability to sell nausea-effectuating in his sweets. 

2. read more important, sophisticated-looking literature. even if Percy thinks Fahrenheit 451 depicts a unsettling relationship between the girl and main character and that he would much rather curl up with a copy of The Beach Café (which Percy was absolutely stoked to realise that it is just one book in a series).

3. vomit in an go to the amusement park and ride that swirly ride that might give Percy an undiagnosed mild concussion, a bruised arm and a fractured rib like last time. note: do not attempt when menstruating.

4. convince his mother, Molly Weasley, that the world would not suddenly combust into ashes, Floo powder and dust if Percy drives farther than oh, 10 minutes away from his house (unfeasible task currently pending).  

5. comprehend why his mother, Molly, sees the way he wears his important paranormal headscarf as a venial sin. 

6. find and buy several pairs of camo pants even though most of Percy's family despises them. 

7. now that he has perfected his recipe for his warm gnocchi salad (approx. 100g gnocchi, roasted mushrooms, eggplant, onions and corn tossed with spinach or kale, with an olive oil dressing, topped with seriously generous amount of parmesan cheese), Percy must now attempt to make a cold ravioli salad using spinach or kale. 

8. use his horde of electronic copies of Seventeen magazines, of which he has skimmed through, categorised by month and year, and then sub-categorised for personal irrelevance... sad note: it took him a MONTH to finish. 

1. Percy implied fairy nargles in this blog post, thus absolving him of any responsibility to explain his inability to maintain a post for any longer than Silvanus Kettleburn contemplated writing his name on his underpants.

9. only vaguely mention but never write a blog post about the atrocity of coffee drinks containing an indigestible dose of unwholesome matcha green tea death powder.